


now i know and now i see

by dialetheism



Series: bow chicka (womp womp): a prompting of sexy aesthetics [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Baby-Making Talk, Established Relationship, Hoorah!, Nonbinary Character, Other, a touch of Edging and Overstimulation, and a healthy dosing of Buttsex, bit of Rimming and Anal Fingering, some Handjobs and Blowjobs, the following mentioned only just briefly and vaguely:
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-17
Updated: 2014-03-17
Packaged: 2018-01-16 00:50:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1325548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dialetheism/pseuds/dialetheism
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>xis small smile stretches into a grin wide with teeth, and Louis has to laugh, shakes eir head fondly as ey push emselves back into a sitting position with fingers curled around the curve of Harry’s shoulders. eir own cock is nowhere near getting into a similar shape any time soon, reposing limply on Harry’s lower pelvis, and even if ey were to manage it eventually, Louis knows ey wouldn’t be able to come very much, if at all.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>although.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>if ever there were a time to attempt a third go ‘round in under two hours, well. Louis figures now a more special occasion than most.</i>
</p><p>-- Louis finishes a conversation that Harry started weeks ago, opens up a new one in the process.</p>
            </blockquote>





	now i know and now i see

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by [this](https://24.media.tumblr.com/e36fcbbe8de32b1997055026dd070950/tumblr_n2k38mWRGM1tnz1nuo1_500.png) (nsfw) photo prompt, which has been sitting in my ficspo folder for months now. so thanks to me for that one, you go me.
> 
> both main characters in this fic identify as nonbinary, each with different chosen pronouns, and as not everyone uses their pronouns in the same way, here are some clarifications: Louis here goes by ey/em/eir/emself, grammatically similar to how one would use the singular they. Harry here goes by xe/xim/xis/ximself, which is hopefully easily read for obvious reasons. if this is still too confusing for you, well. i'm not sorry.
> 
> also, don't get too excited about all those non-tags in the header -- they really are very terribly brief, the actual sex isn't even vaguely described so much as it's mentioned, and as is becoming habit for me, no one gets to come on-screen. also, the baby-talk is _not_ of the mpreg variety. and not even just because neither of the characters identify as male, aha :) x
> 
> not beta'd, not britpick'd, not true; all mistakes are my own, and anything read here should be taken with a grain of salt. title from the song _Honey & I_ by Haim.

\-----  
 **11:58AM**  
\-----

Louis lets eir head loll lazily to one side, darts eir eyes to the dimmed display of the digital clock sat at an angle on their bedside table, and boggles a bit; it’s been almost two hours, they’ve been at it for _two hours_ now. Louis believes it, obviously, can feel every minute in the strain on eir thighs. but still. athletic overtures such as these deserve some sort of recognition, acknowledgement, like a plaque or a trophy.

not that ey mind, though, trophy or no. because Louis’ been working up to something here, in these two hours, and if ey have to pay for it with sore muscles later on in the day, well. ey’re just hoping it’ll be worth it, that it won’t be all for naught. and if nothing else, at least Louis got to pleasure in this much - Harry’s multiple failed attempts at staying quiet, the near palpable desperation that xe can never quite help letting slip out in damp puffs of breath, in mewling whines from bitten-red lips. that’s always a nice time.

Harry’s already come once, of course, straight down Louis’ throat something like forty-five minutes ago. and Louis hadn’t allowed xim even the thought of a chance at recovery before ey were flipping Harry onto xis back, pushing xim into the mattress as Louis straddled xis hips and sunk down onto xis cock, eir hole still loose where Harry had rimmed and fingered em open earlier. Louis’ kept xim on edge ever since -- grinding into xis lap just enough to ensure xe stays hard, slowing to a stop every once in a while so that xe doesn’t get any cheeky ideas about getting off just yet, then starting up another filthy rhythm the second it seems that xe’s caught xis breath.

for eir part, Louis is doing just fine. more than. ey came first on Harry’s tongue, one hand in xis hair and the other wanking eir cock on the bottom lip of xis open mouth, and then again on xis fingers not too long after, head thrown back and spine arched as Harry sucked bruises onto the inside of eir thighs. so yeah, Louis is doing _just fine_ right now, currently resting comfortably in Harry’s lap while xe struggles to calm xis panting.

“Haz, hey,” Louis starts, raises a hand up to eir mouth so ey can wet the pad of eir thumb. ey breathe a soft little sigh when ey use it to pinch at a perked nipple, the modest weight of eir breast cupped in eir palm as ey go on, “d’you remember that thing we talked about last month, babe? that thing you thought a good idea to bring up on the day after your birthday, while we were sat up on the kitchen counter eating leftover cake right from the box, hmm, remember that?”

Harry sucks in a sharp wince of air through xis teeth, jaw locked, hisses a stuttered _fuck_ that seems to stretch out three syllables long. “ _fuck_ ,” xe repeats, mouth dropped open on a gasp when Louis clenches around xis dick pointedly.

“what about all the print-outs you’ve been leaving everywhere, strategically placed about the goddamn flat, remember them?” Harry has the decency to look sheepish at that one, and Louis bites back a satisfied smirk to narrow eir eyes meaningfully, “found one of your little informational packets just this morning, actually, in the refrigerator of all places, tucked in between the milk and the orange juice.”

“s-sorry,” Harry trips over xis words, caught off guard when Louis rolls eir hips one, two, three times counterclockwise. “i’ll - i can stop, if you - if it’s annoying - or, like --” xe cuts ximself off when Louis’ hips move in a grind four, five, six times in the opposite direction, head flung back onto xis pillow, throat exposed, adam’s apple bobbing when xe forces down and out a deep inhale and exhale before tipping xis chin onto xis chest. Harry’s voice is all of a rasp, but xis stare is as intense as ever when xe says, “if i’ve upset you - if you want me to stop, Lou, i will.”

and Louis knows that. no question about it, Louis knows as surely as ey know the calloused slide of Harry’s fingers twining with eirs or the slick glide of eir tongue over the enamel of Harry’s front teeth -- if Louis wanted xim to stop, Harry would.

except. that’s not the case here and now, so.

with an affected nonchalance, Louis shrugs, works down against Harry’s hips a few more times, before coming to a stop, “nah, you’re alright.”

Harry’s brow furrows immediately, lips quirked in an odd pout and eyes just as obviously confused. Louis waves a hand vaguely, slides the other down eir own chest and over Harry’s to tweak at one of xis nipples; ey have to fight hard against the ridiculous grin threatening to overtake eir face, ducks eir head and attempts to distract away from it with touch, fingers skittering across flushed skin and smoothing out the edges of dark ink.

“yeah, no, actually,” Louis exhales around a shaky chuckle, traces the line of a sparrow’s tail feather along Harry’s collarbone. “they’ve been very educational, your packets,” ever so slowly, Harry’s eyebrows have begun to climb up into xis fringe as xis eyes widen. Louis scratches a nail over the curling script of a banner held aloft by twin tattooed beaks, reads their message again and again until it sticks: _and you found me, and you found me, **and you**_ \-- “pretty fucking frightening that bit about the surrogates, honestly, but i’m sure we’ll manage, yeah?”

“are you..” Harry trails off with a panicked whisper, xis grip on the curve of Louis’ hips tightening just so. Louis can feel xis heart pick up a kick-drum beat where eir hands have spread open on xis chest. “please tell me you’re not.. that wouldn’t be a very nice joke, Lou.”

Louis rolls eir eyes, “of course i’m not joking! first off, much as technology has advanced in recent years, i doubt we’re anywhere near being able to - and could you just imagine me? gone plump and round all over, tits swollen with milk and sensitive as all --”

“Lou, _please_ ,” Harry interrupts, imploring, and. fine.

with a sigh that comes from deep in eir chest like all of the air leaving a balloon, Louis deflates and falls forward. eir elbows bend as ey drop, pushing their chests together as close as possible, and eir hands come up to cup Harry’s neck just lightly, thumbs brushing along the cut of xis jaw. Louis risks one quick, terrified glance into Harry’s wide eyes before squeezing eir lids shut tight, pressing in even closer to lean eir forehead against Harry’s.

“not fucking about, Hazza, promise,” Louis pauses, stalling, rubs the side of Harry’s nose with eir own. their lips ghost ever so slightly like this, the smallest bit damp from Louis’ breath stirring warmly between them as ey speak, “we should do it, let’s do it.”

the arms that Harry has wrapped around Louis’ waist flex unconsciously in response, quickly followed by Harry’s voice, sounding both hesitant and hopeful low in xis throat, “yeah?”

Louis isn’t sure when they started whispering, is only now noticing it, but in the quiet of their bedroom, it suddenly feels fitting somehow. as if this is the only way this particular conversation could have ever gone. 

but then, just as suddenly - deja vu hits Louis smack in the face, and ey’re reminded of another such conversation, one ey’d had with eir mother only a few days ago; _even as young as you are?_ she had asked em, her voice cautious even through the static over speakerphone. and again, it comes to Louis like a shock - the stunningly inevitable realization that eir answer now is going to be the same as it had been then, just as automatic and just as confident.

“yeah,” ey confirm, pull back just enough to make sure Harry is paying attention when ey stress it a second time: “ _yeah_.”

a small smile slowly unravels across Harry’s lips, a smile that’s probably mirrored in the same silently pleased way on Louis’ own face. Harry’s thighs twitch minutely beneath the seat of Louis’ ass then, and xis hips jerk up against Louis’ stutteringly, and that’s right -- Harry’s still dicked up into em. still incredibly hard, as well.

xis small smile stretches into a grin wide with teeth, and Louis has to laugh, shakes eir head fondly as ey push emselves back into a sitting position with fingers curled around the curve of Harry’s shoulders. eir own cock is nowhere near getting into a similar shape any time soon, reposing limply on Harry’s lower pelvis, and even if ey were to manage it eventually, Louis knows ey wouldn’t be able to come very much, if at all.

although.

if ever there were a time to attempt a third go ‘round in under two hours, well. Louis figures now a more special occasion than most.

“hey, Haz,” looking down into Harry’s laughing face, Louis uses eir hands on xis chest as leverage to pull up from Harry’s lap, knees dimpling the mattress at either side of xis hips, and then rocks back onto xis cock with intent. Harry’s expression remains amused, the bastard, even as xe stutters around a groan and then thrusts up off the sheets to meet Louis’ next rough grind accordingly.

“hey,” Louis repeats, finds emselves going warm and fuzzy up through eir chest, feeling both mildly hysterical and utterly calm. “let's make a baby.”

\-----  
 **10:01AM**  
\-----

Harry feels ximself come awake slowly and in pieces, the warm weight of a naked chest settling along xis own naked back and then the smell of freshly-brewed tea welcomed gratefully by xis nose; xe slits open xis eyes just enough that the first thing xe sees is xis favorite mug waiting on the bedside table, their digital clock right behind it announcing how very _too early_ in the day it is.

a teasing nibble of teeth at xis earlobe has Harry inhaling sharply in surprise, lips already curling into a smirk as xe stretches out xis arm to trace a finger along the handle of xis mug. Louis speaks directly into xis ear, voice still rough despite how ey’ve obviously been awake long enough at least to have gone through the paces of eir morning ritual.

“hurry and drink that up, will you, love?” Louis nuzzles eir nose into the curls at Harry’s temple, and then rolls eir hips into the small of Harry’s back, just above xis bum. xe realizes that Louis’ already fully hard, little dick resting along Harry’s arsecrack, and xe has to bite xis lip against a delighted giggle. “woke up with a cheeky erection this morning, which, as you know, i’ve not done for some time. thought you might like to help me take care of it, yeah?”

Harry lets ximself laugh now, rumbly from xis throat and low with disuse overnight, and xe jostles Louis a bit when xe props up on an elbow to reach around for xis tea properly. as xe takes hold of the handle and brings the rim of xis mug up to xis lips, Harry remembers something with such a start that xe splashes a few drops of tea over xis fingers and onto xis pillow.

when xe’d gotten out of bed for a piss late last night, Harry had creeped into the living room afterward, tip-toed over to their entertainment center and carefully selected yet another stapled packet of informational print-outs from xis secret stash hidden behind the foreign film section of their dvd collection. this one in particular outlined options outside the realm of basic adoption and delved further into the concept of surrogacy, and Harry had snuck into the kitchen skimming through it with a silent thrill running up xis spine. then xe’d slipped it into the refrigerator between a half-gallon carton of milk and bottle of pineapple-orange juice, and gone back to bed right after.

looking down into xis mug now, Harry sees that xis tea is light with just the right amount of milky dilution, and knows that Louis must have seen xis packet when ey’d prepared breakfast earlier. xe spares an anxious second to wonder if Louis is starting to get annoyed yet, whether xe has time for another few weeks of persistent packet-pushing before Louis loses eir patience completely. but then again. ey haven’t actually said anything about it either way, so Harry lets it go for now, takes a sip of tea and finds it perfectly sweetened as well. bless.

“mm,” xe hums into another deep pull from xis mug and then shoots a pleased smile of thanks over xis shoulder. Louis’ sat up on Harry’s upper thighs by now, wanking lazily over the swell of Harry’s bum. xe pauses a moment to just have a good look at em, golden in the sunlight flooding in from their open blinds. and yes, Louis had said something along the lines of morning sex, which. _yes_ , absolutely. “could do, i think, yeah.”

\----

**Author's Note:**

> once again: i'm on tumblr [here](http://dialethetic.tumblr.com/) if you'd like to leave a sexy~ aesthetic prompt (photo, audio, video only - no specific pairing or au ideas), or even just to say hello!
> 
> thnx, pals ;D


End file.
